"You Gotta Eat!"

Nine days after my arrival in Germany, a cousin succumbed to cancer.

Asked to move in with his wife, I faced the difference of cultures concerning community grieving.

When my mother had lost her valiant battle to breast cancer.18 months earlier, food-bearing neighbors began arriving as soon as her obituary was in the newspaper. Although tears flowed, trembling smiles and happy memories accompanyied brown sugar edged hams, creamy casseroles and chocolate layer cakes.

Chocolate, in the form of candy, accompanied every person who entered the cousin's house for the next four days.  Neighbors of the bereaved also brought cartons of cigarettes and flowers, mainly roses in dark, depressing hues.

The coffee pot brewed constantly. Food, than the occasional cheese and meat platter, was the only nourishment any of us consumed leading up to the funeral.

Was it any wonder at the church we were miserable with both grief and constipation?

Sorrow often manifests in a loss of appetite.

However, as my grandmother would have said, “you gotta eat.”

No one expects you to polish off a five-course meal

Instead, a bowl of soup, a piece of toast and a cup of green tea or glass of milk will help clear the cobwebs.

Hold the bowl between your hands and feel its radiating heat in your hands.  Smell the butter as it melts into the toast’s grainy texture.

Focus on the simple act of feeding your body.

Let your soul have its woes, but keep your physical body healthy able to support you through the anguish.